Hi friends! Martha here with the important link to our latest episode. This week, we discuss sexuality and what it means for us, two people pretending to be adults. Sexuality can be a tricky thing to discuss, as it can be perceived differently by everyone, and sometimes we’re still not sure exactly how to define even pertaining to ourselves.
Below are links to some delightful articles as well and I hope you take the time to read them and learn a little bit more.
- 3D Clit
- Thanks to 3D tech, we can print a scale model of the clitoris beyond what you are able to see, giving better understanding of the female anatomy and how it works. A big plus for women’s health and sexuality, as we know oh so much about male sex organs and have neglected to understand how female sex organs work, leaving it all to scientific mysteries being “solved” by pseudo-science and clickbait (phrasing!) articles.
- Virginity myths
- There’s more to being a virgin beyond what we think of when we hear “virgin,” and we should move beyond it because not only is it damaging but also inaccurate. Limiting factors to sex and sexuality could be tied to difficulty in expressing sexual preferences or ability to have sex in what’s considered to be “normal.”
- Sex and depression
- JoEllen Notte conducted survey about sex and depression, uncovered a bias in her own original survey that was influenced by contemporary belief that depression leads to a lower sex drive, but later found that 25% of respondents had increased sexual activity
- Admits that her research is not fully scientific, but is hoping to change the approach and dialog on how to handle depression while in a relationship
- Advises that, based on her data, best approach is to “be a team” and not attempt to fix the other person; this can lead to “tension and resentment” and causes a negative dynamic in which one partner is perceived as functional and the other not
- It is very possible to have a healthy relationship in which one or more partners are experience mental illness
- Is porn bad for sexuality?
- There’s a lot of open ended questions that research into porn and human sexuality can’t properly answer with a “but” or an “if.” Sure, there’s pornography that is genuinely degrading and often people are being exploited, but does it affect behaviors and attitudes of the viewer? That’s still difficult to answer. Of course, as more research is applied and more data collected, we can get a better picture of just how porn influences or conditions us. For example, one study found that men who viewed porn were more “desirous of physical relationships.” Couples watching porn also reported increased desire to be with partner. So maybe our perception of pornography is more negative than its actual impact.
- But is it damaging to men specifically and their perception of seual adequacy?
- Porn can trigger the same addictive responses such as drugs or gambling, and for some men, it creates a false ideal/expectation. However, it should be noted that this is rooted in more compulsive behaviors. If something, anything, is dominating the majority of your daily activities and interfering with your life to the point that interpersonal relationships are strained and judgment is impaired, then, yes, it is damaging and should be treated. You can maintain a healthy life and relationships while also enjoying porno. I know I do.